It's the eighth day in the Sim Brother Couples house. Tonight either Aisha and Corinne, Kim and Roy, or Tammi-Louise and Wilbur will become the first couple to be evicted. Later, two new couples will also be entering.
Most of the housemates are awake. Sasha is preparing breakfast in the kitchen for herself and Vaughn as well as Kalyani and Naveen.
Kalyani: You sure you're allowed to do this?
Sasha: Yeah. I asked Sim Brother and as long as Vaughn and I only eat what's our food and you and Naveen only eat what's yours, I can cook for all of us.
Kalyani: Nice! Sasha: Didn't think of you as such a stickler for the rules. (Laughs).
Kalyani: In real life, I'm not, but Sim Brother can make your life really miserable in here if he wanted to.
Sasha: True. I was always a goody-two-shoes at school.
Kalyani: That doesn't surprise me one bit.
Sasha: I never had detention.
Kalyani: Seriously? Not once?
Kalyani: Don't you feel like you didn't get the whole school experience!? You were robbed!
Sasha: By not sitting in a classroom during break or after school? (Laughs).
Kalyani: Yeah! Getting in trouble is what school was all about! Sasha: And learning?
Kalyani: That, too.
Sasha: How many detentions did you have?
Kalyani: Christ. Rounding up...
Sasha: Rounding up!?
Kalyani: Probably fifty or so. No lie.
Sasha: Jesus Christ! How were you never expelled!?
Kalyani: Because it was never serious enough. It was always for me being a gobby bitch to the teachers.
Sasha: And why doesn't that surprise me? (Laughs).
Kalyani: Shut up and finish my breakfast!
Kim and Roy are in the bedroom.
Kim: That could've been our final sleep in here.
Roy: I have a feeling it was.
Kim: Oh, honey, let's try and be positive!
Roy: I am being positive. I just have a feeling we're going.
Kim: I hope the kids will be excited to see us if we do go.
Roy: Maybe. But we've been away from then longer when on vacation!
Kim: I know. (Laughs). I definitely want longer than a week in here.
Roy: Either way though, we have to be grateful for the time we've had! We're in here and had this experience together. And all our friends and family are happy and healthy. Considering the year so many people have had, we need to thank God and count our blessings.
Kim: Absolutely, darling. You always know just how to put things into perspective. I love you.
Roy: And I love you, too.
Six minutes later...
Kalyani, Naveen, Sasha, and Vaughn are eating breakfast in the kitchen.
Naveen: This is killer, Sasha.
Sasha: Thanks! If that's actually a good thing?
Naveen: (Laughs). It is.
Kalyani: Vaughn, don't you want to sit down? We could move to the dining table? Vaughn: Nah. I'm fine standing up.
Sasha: He eats standing up all the time at home.
Kalyani: The fuck!? Why!?
Vaughn: It's what I'm comfortable doing. (Laughs). Back when I first left uni, my flat didn't have a table or chairs or anything and I didn't wanna spill shit on my sofa so I just used to stand in my tiny kitchen and eat over the sink.
Kalyani: But you know you don't have to do that anymore? (Laughs).
Vaughn: I sort of enjoy it.
Naveen: Freak of nature.
Vaughn: Fuck you. (Laughs). It takes me back to humbler times.
Sasha: I despair of him. Honestly.
Sexuality is the topic of conversation for Aisha, Aleks, Corinne, and Emery in the lounge.
Corinne: I've always known I liked girls. Literally. All my life.
Aisha: You like girls!?
Aleks: That's news to me!
Emery: (Laughs). You know what I mean. My first crush was the boy from Mary Poppins. I loved him so much when I was little! I used to want him to be my boyfriend! He was so sweet with his little freckles!
Aleks: (Laughs). Wonder what he's up to today.
Aisha: I'm sorry, but he died.
Emery: NO! When!?
Aisha: Years ago. He was in his early twenties, I think.
Corinne: No way! Seriously!?
Aisha: Yeah. Pretty sure. The girl who played his sister is still alive. She made a cameo in the new Mary Poppins.
Emery: Screw her! Michael Banks is dead!?
Aisha: Afraid so.
Aisha: I think he got an infection abroad or something.
Emery: You're having me on!
Aisha: I'm not. Honestly.
Aisha: I've put a damper on things, haven't I?
Aleks: (Laughs). Just a bit. Change the subject, Aisha, when did you know you were gay?
Aisha: Probably when I hit puberty.
Aleks: Yeah. That's around the time I started to notice, too.
Emery: I'm actually devastated.
Aisha: Aw, Emery! I'm sorry!
Aleks: He'll be on about this all day now.
Tammi-Lousie is still in bed.
Wilbur has joined Kim, Maximillian, Roy, and Zsa Zsa by the campfire.
Maximillian: Tammi OK?
Wilbur: Yeah. Just think she's got a headache. They're letting her sleep in a little while.
Kim: How you feeling about tonight?
WIlbur: To be honest, I haven't given it much thought, Kim. What will be will be.
Kim: Wish I could say the same!
Zsa Zsa: I'm really annoyed with how fast this week has gone. It's just flown by.
Roy: It has, but it also feels like we've been in here for ages?
Zsa Zsa: I know. It's strange.
Maximillian: I wonder what's been going on outside this past week. A lot can in happen in a week. Especially in this God-forsaken year.
Wilbur: Oh, we should try and not think about it. And enjoy our blissful ignorance in here.
Kim: They were starting to roll out vaccines, weren't they? In the UK, I mean?
Zsa Zsa: I think so. And they had a very high success rate, the one they're gonna give out, so it really does seem like light at the end of the tunnel.
Roy: I wouldn't put anything past this year though.
Maximillian: No. It seems like it's been a cursed year, for sure.
Zsa Zsa: The election, aside.
Roy: (Laughs). We'll give you that one.
Emery and Kalyani are in the bathroom.
Kalyani: I better not be getting a spot when we're live on TV tonight.
Emery: I don't think you are. But even if you are, just cover it up with make-up. You're not even a nominee. Nobody will even be looking at you.
Kalyani: Oh, darling, of course they will.
Emery: (Laughs). Attention whore.
Kalyani: Shut your face.
Kalyani: Why the fuck is Tammi still in bed anyway?
Emery: Think she's got a headache.
Kalyani: Yeah. All right. Have you noticed Wilbur seems to spend more time with the oldies in here than he does with her?
Emery: A little, But he's bound to have more in common with them, isn't he?
Kalyani: Not sure I buy their romance, if I'm completely honest. I did at first, but I don't see much of a spark.
Emery: Ah. I dunno.
Kalyani: You think the best in everyone, babes. It's not a bad thing. But Wilbur has money. Look at the clothes he wears. And they've mentioned having some sort of estate.
Kalyani: Aleks: Tammi and Wilbur. Real romance, or what?
Aleks: Probably not.
Kalyani: Not just me, then.
Emery: You pair of bitches! I think they're nice people!
Kalyani: Oh, they are. But people have different shades, darling. And you'll be surprised what people will do for money. That's all I'm saying.
Tammi-Louise is now awake and has joined Zsa Zsa in the snug.
Zsa Zsa: You feeling better, sweetie?
Tammi-Louise: Yeah. They gave me some tablets and I slept it off. Feel right as rain now.
Zsa Zsa: Good! And you're OK about tonight?
Tammi-Louise: Yep! I'm starting to get a little nervous but that's probably because I'm gonna be on TV.
Zsa Zsa: Hate to break this to you, darling, but I think you've been on TV all week.
Tammi-Louise: (Laughs). You know what I meant. I'm feeling a bit nervy about something...
Zsa Zsa: What?
Tammi-Louise: Wilbur and I need to get our things together and being the top couple, we can't do our own laundry...
Zsa Zsa: Just ask Aisha and Corinne. I'm sure they'll be fine about it. It's not like it's your fault they have to do it.
Tammi-Louise: Yeah. True. It's just awkward.
Eleven minutes later...
Tammi-Louise: Morning, ladies.
Corinne: Afternoon, more like.
Aisha: You OK?
Tammi-Louise: I'm fine, thanks. I'm sorry to even ask this, but considering Wilbur and I might be going tonight we need to sort out our clothes...
Aisha: I'll do your laundry. No problem.
Tammi-Louise: Thanks so much, Aisha. I know it's awkward.
Aisha: Not at all. It's part of the game. (Laughs). I'll come up in a minute.
Tammi-Louise: Thank you!
Corinne: (Mumbles) Stuck-up cow.
Three minutes later...
Aisha: Oh, this room is so lovely!
Wilbur: Hopefully you can get in here next time.
Aisha: With any luck.
Wilbur: Thanks, Aisha!
Aisha: No worries.
Aisha: 'Hopefully you'll get in here next time!' Blah, blah, blah. (Sighs). I hate this game.
Maximillian and Zsa Zsa are in the bedroom.
Zsa Zsa: I've been thinking, beloved husband.
Maximillian: The dreaded sentence no man wants to hear. What you thinking?
Zsa Zsa: I want us all to be able to have a meal together tonight. It's something we've never been able to do. And considering we're losing a couple tonight, it's going to be our last chance.
Maximillian: We can't exactly do that though, can we? Sim Brother has his rules.
Zsa Zsa: Maybe he can be talked out of them?
Maximillian: Are you plotting, my sweet?
Zsa Zsa: Perhaps, I am.
Maximillian: Then Lord help Sim Brother.
Two minutes later...
Zsa Zsa has come to the diary room.
Zsa Zsa: You and I need to talk.
Sim Brother: Hello, Zsa Zsa. What would you like to talk to Sim Brother about?
Zsa Zsa: As you know, it's the first eviction tonight and we're gonna lose one of our number. I would like to ask, if possible, we can all eat together in the dining area?
Sim Brother: The lowest ranked couple can only eat in their outside quarters.
Zsa Zsa: Right. So, even if they cook their own food out there, you can't let them off on this one occasion to sit with the rest of us?
Sim Brother: The rules will not be changed, Zsa Zsa.
Zsa Zsa: That really is horrible. Why do you have to be so cruel!? It's Christmas, you know! Good will to all men means nothing to you!?
Zsa Zsa: So, if that's not allowed, I suppose I can't use any of my food to cook for the others either?
Sim Brother: Couples are only allowed to eat food that belongs to them.
Zsa Zsa: You cruel, cruel man. You're messing with the wrong woman, Sim Brother!
Sim Brother: Are you sure you want to mess with Sim Brother, Zsa Zsa?
Zsa Zsa: Well, you can think you've got the better of me this time! But I'm a crafty woman when I want to be and I think you're in for a surprise! Sim Brother: Sim Brother will not tolerate any rule breaking.
Zsa Zsa: There won't be any rule breaking, Sim Brother. Oh, no. I won't need to break any of your rules to get my way.
Maximillian and Zsa Zsa are in the kitchen.
Maximillian: Well, you're certainly undeterred, I'll give you that.
Zsa Zsa: No one gets the better of me, Max! I'll show him! Now, for the love of God, do NOT mix up any of these dishes.
Maximillian: Right. So, remind me of what we're doing one more time?
Zsa Zsa: I can cook for everyone, even Aisha and Corinne, in their quarters mind you, which I've already done. The one thing everyone has that we can all eat is pasta. So pasta is what we're all having! I'd like to have done a nice steak, personally, but we can't too picky, can we? Maximillian: Apparently not.
Zsa Zsa: So, if I prepare the food and we only eat what we're allowed to eat, then no rules have been broken.
Maximillian: And sitting together?
Zsa Zsa: There might be rules about Aisha and Corinne sitting in here to eat, but there's no rules about us sitting out there. Nor are there any rules about us moving the furniture.
Maximillian: (Gasps). You manipulative shrew!
Zsa Zsa: That's me.
All of the housemates are eating pasta in the outside dining quarters.
Corinne: This was such a cool idea, Zsa Zsa!
Aisha: I agree. Very thoughtful.
Kim: It's nice we can all sit together for once!
Roy: Indeed. Break bread together before two of us have to go.
Sasha: I just hope they don't punish you, babe.
Zsa Zsa: How can they punish me? I've not broken any rules! Kalyani: (Laughs). Zsa Zsa, you're actually a legend. You've totally played Sim Brother at his own game.
Zsa Zsa: Indeed, I have.
Vaughn: Still, it's a bit cold. I haven't missed sitting out here to eat.
Corinne: Rub it in.
Vaughn: Sorry. (Laughs).
Kalyani: The pasta's really good, too.
Emery: Yeah. I'm impressed.
Zsa Zsa: Some of you have more of a plain meal, I'm afraid. I couldn't mix any ingredients. I could only work with what you all had.
Naveen: Nah. You've done a wicked job. This is delicious.
Tammi-Louise: This has been truly lovely everyone! You've been great and this has been an awesome experience. I just wanted to say that in case Wilbur and I leave tonight.
Wilbur: And I second everything Tammi just said.
Kim: Yeah. This has been truly lovely. It'd be sad for it to be over so soon, but it's been a lovely week.
Corinne: And I'd just be fucked off to go, to be honest.
Aisha: (Laughs).. Corinne!
Sasha: Gotta admire the honesty. (Laughs).
Emery is doing the washing up.
Emery: Don't you know that you're Toxic?
The nominated housemates are getting ready for the eviction.
Tammi-Louise: It's been nice having this en-suite these last two nights, even if we do go.
Wilbur: Absolutely. I won't want to go back to that dreaded bedroom.
Tammi-Louise: And I sure as shit am not going to that bunker!
Wilbur: I wonder what'll happen if we go, if someone will take the top spot and get to sleep in here until the five days are up. Maybe Maximillian and Zsa Zsa will become the top couple?
Tammi-Louise: Fuck nows. Anyway. We're not going! Positive thoughts!
Corinne: You look amazing!
Aisha: I do!? Look at you! As fit as the night I first met you.
Corinne: I hope we stay.
Aisha: I do, too. I'm not ready for this to be over just yet.
Corinne: I love you.
Aisha: I love you more.
Sasha: Kim, honestly, you look stunning.
Kim: Thank you, darling. This was the dress I'd packed in case we got to the final, but I don't think we're getting there!
Sasha: You don't know that! Kim: I have a feeling, sweetie.
Sasha: I really don't want you to go! Kim: I don't want to go either! Hopefully we'll stay! You never know!
Sasha: Promise we'll be friends on the outside, though?
Kim: Absolutely we will! That you can be assured!
Sasha: You look great, Roy!
Kim: Very handsome.
Roy: I'm feeling a bit nervous now.
Kim: Me too. (Laughs). We'll be fine though. No matter the outcome.
The housemates are beginning to gather in the lounge for the eviction.
Corinne: You both look great! Roy: Thanks, Corinne! As do you! Kim: Very pretty in pink!
Corinne: My favourite colour. (Laughs). Roy, I just wanted to thank you again for helping me yesterday. To be honest, when you guys came in here I thought a certain way and I feel like I totally misjudged you and I want to say I'm sorry.
Roy: Don't be stupid! We're all guilty of judging people too quickly sometimes, Kim and I more than anyone! Perhaps take this as a learning curve, that there's more to people than meets the eye? And more than where they live or what they believe.
Corinne: Absolutely. I will.
All of the housemates aside from Tammi-Louise are in the lounge.
Corinne: Where the hell is she!? (Laughs).
Wilbur: She always takes this long to get ready.
Vaughn: They're probably gonna do the eviction any minute...
Naveen: Any second more like.
Sim Brother: Tammi-Louise must go to the lounge IMMEDIATELY.
Tammi-Louise: Calm yourself. I'm here.
Zsa Zsa: Fashionably late! What a stunner!
Sasha: You look amazing, babe!
Kim: Yeah! Gorgeous!
Tammi-Louise: Thanks, you guys! You're too sweet!
Kalyani: (Mutters). All eyes on her. Just as she wants.
It's been six minutes since Kim and Roy became the first couple to be evicted from the Sim Brother house.
Maximillian: We're all so quiet.
Emery: It feels weird that we're actually two people down now!
Aleks: And we'll keep dropping like flies now probably.
Sasha: I'm really gonna miss them.
Zsa Zsa: Me too! I'm quite sad.
Maximillian: They're gonna see their kids and have a great Christmas. They'll be just fine.
Vaughn: Absolutely. They will be, babe.
Sasha: I know.
Naveen: And well done to you guys for surviving! You must be thrilled! Tammi-Louise: Yeah. It's a really nice feeling! We stayed! Yay!
Wilbur: (Laughs). It's nice to know people have backed us.
Corinne: I was surprised. I honestly thought she was gonna say our name.
Aisha: Me too.
Vaughn: Goes to show, you never know what the outcome of these evictions are gonna be. We don't know what the viewers are seeing and what they want to continue watching.
Aisha: Very true.
A new couple Bryce and Ofelia have just entered the house.
Sasha: This is actually insane! Emery: We didn't think they'd throw in new people!
Bryce: You're not disappointed, I hope?
Tammi-Louise: Of course not!
Sasha: I'm Sasha! Lovely to meet you! Bryce: I'm Bryce. Nice to meet you, too. What a place you have here.
Sasha: Lovely, isn't it?
Wilbur: Hi there! Welcome! I'm Wilbur!
Ofelia: Hi, Wilbur. I'm Ofelia. Lovely to meet you.
Wilbur: You, too! You look lovely!
Ofelia: Thank you very much!
Aleks: Hey! I'm Aleks!
Ofelia: Hiya! Nice to meet you, mate! Man, this is fucking mental.
Aleks: (Laughs). Yeah. It must be.
Three minutes later...
The housemates are getting to know the newcomers.
Ofelia: So, you really weren't expecting new people?
Sasha: Not at all!
Maximillian: We assumed because this was a special series and the house was quite packed anyway that nobody else would be coming in.
Vaughn: But it's lovely to have you!
Bryce: Pleased to hear it! Newcomers can sometimes get given a rough time in here.
Zsa Zsa: Not from us, honey!
Bryce: I'll take your word for that.
Ofelia: So, what are the sleeping arrangements like?
Aleks: Oh, boy. That's a whole other story in on itself.
The final couple to enter the series, Dennis and Lionel, have just entered.
Ofelia: So, how --
Emery: MORE PEOPLE! Ofelia: Wha-!?
Lionel: Come get me, fellas!
Kalyani: Hi, buddy! I'm Kalyani! Lovely to meet you!
Dennis: Lovely to meet you, too, pretty one! I'm Dennis!
Kalyani: Dennis, I love you already!
Emery: How fab are you!?
Lionel: Very! I'm Lionel, sweetheart. Who the hell are you?
Emery: (Laughs). I'm Emery.
Lionel: Emery, what a pleasure! We're gonna have fun in here!
Dennis: That outfit is everything. Mind Lionel doesn't steal it. I'm Dennis, my love!
Zsa Zsa: He's welcome to it! I'm Zsa Zsa, Dennis! Welcome to the house!
Dennis: Why, thank you! It's very nice! I think we'll fit right in! (Chuckles).
Corinne: LOVE THE PINK! I'm Corinne!
Lionel: We match! Great minds think alike, huh? I'm Lionel, sweetness!
Corinne: I'm so excited to meet you! You're amazing!
Lionel: Aw. Well noticed.
All of the housemates are in the lounge. The newcomers have just had the ranking system explained to them by their fellow housemates.
Ofelia: That sounds awful.
Corinne: It is. We're basically sleeping in a bunker.
Bryce: I wonder how that's going to affect us intruders?
Dennis: We'd be OK sleeping wherever, wouldn't we, Lionel?
Lionel: I've slept in the back of a rubbish truck. Nothing phases me. Though, I as a bit younger then, granted.
Aisha: Seriously!? (Laughs).
Lionel: Oh, yes. The rubbish man got quite the fright in the morning. He had to help me out. And by that point my wig was askew and my tights were down by my ankles.
Sim Brother: This is Sim Brother, housemates please pay close attention.
Sim Brother: Bryce and Ofelia. Dennis and Lionel. Welcome to the Sim Brother house.
Ofelia: Whoo! It's great to be here!
Dennis: We're all beside ourselves.
Sim Brother: As you are aware, there is a ranking system for the couples in this series. One of the two new couples will take the spot of evicted housemates Kim and Roy and be the fourth ranked couple for the next three nights until the next challenge.
Vaughn: That makes sense.
Bryce: But the other couple?
Sim Brother: The other couple will take a new spot as the eighth ranked couple.
Ofelia: Oh, shit.
Sim Brother: They will also have to use the outside quarters to use the toilet, shower, and eat, but instead of having their own shopping budget, they will live on basic rations. And instead of sleeping in the bunker, they will be provided with a tent.
Bryce: Oh, c'mon!
Kalyani: Fuck me that's harsh!
Sim Brother: Who gets what slot is down to your fellow housemates. Aisha and Corinne, please stand up.
Corinne: Fucking hell.
Aisha: This is really harsh!
Sasha: I can't believe they're doing this!
Sim Brother: Aisha and Corinne, which new housemates do you want to become the bottom ranked couple?
Dennis: Pick us.
Lionel: Yeah. We'll be fine. It's a laugh.
Corinne: You sure?
Dennis: Yes, darling.
Corinne: OK. Then sadly, we vote for Dennis and Lionel.
Lionel: YOU BITCHES!
Lionel: I'm joking, darling! (Cackles).
Aisha: Oh! (Laughs).
Sim Brother: Aleks and Emery, please stand up.
Emery: No hard feelings whoever we pick.
Bryce: Pick them. They're fine with it. (Laughs).
Aleks: Should we?
Emery: Sorry, no, but I'm not voting to send two seniors -